Talking to Strangers: What We Should Know About the People We Don’t Know

Think of a time when you thought someone misjudged you. How do you think they formed their opinion of you? How did you feel about the situation?

Given the lessons in this book, do you think you should change how you interact with strangers? Why or why not?

Choose one of the stories discussed in this book. Using the concepts you have learned, explain what the people involved could have done differently when communicating with each other. How would the situation have ended differently?

Many of the stories that Gladwell includes in this book pertain to very dark topics, such as rape, suicide, and murder. Why do you think he chooses to spend a significant portion of the book focusing on such harrowing events?

Do you think this book fully explains why we miscommunicate with strangers, or do you think there are more factors that Gladwell does not discuss? Explain your case. 

It is commonly argued that to get along better with other people, we need to empathize with them, or “walk a mile in their shoes.” How are Gladwell’s arguments similar to or different from such a view? 

Gladwell was inspired to write this book after learning about the encounter between Sandra Bland and Brian Encinia. What about that story do you think stands out compared to all the other stories in the book?

Gladwell calls Encinia’s actions a “collective failure” because other people had taught him to behave the way he did. To what extent are the mistakes cited in the rest of the book collective versus individual failures?