Tasting the Sky: A Palestinian Childhood

Although Ibtisam’s family returns to Ramallah, they do not return to the normalcy of their pre-war lives. Instead, Mother and the children continue to feel the effects of the war, which result in more fear and family separation before resolving into a new normal. Ibtisam details the most important things in her young life: her family, especially her brothers, and her home with the sense of freedom it conveys. Ibtisam’s description of her daily life gives the reader insight into Palestinian social and cultural norms, and she begins to expand her understanding of the importance of education.

Returning home to Ramallah causes new anxiety: The family is again separated from Father as they cross back to the West Bank, making Ibtisam and her brothers uncertain when, and if, they will see him again. The presence of the nearby Israeli soldiers and their constant gunfire instill fear, reminding Mother and the children of the war and its continuing uncertainty. While their home is no longer the haven it once was, the family is together. Togetherness is a part of Ibtisam’s concept of home. Mother’s decision to remove the kids and herself to the orphanage shatters Ibtisam’s sense of security and safety in her family. Feeling unhappy, afraid, and lonely by herself in the small house and upset at staying inside with the children, Mother argues that Father cannot keep them safe. Her argument emasculates Father, as does Mother’s lie to orphanage officials that he is dead. Although Mother’s decision is based on keeping the family safe, it has a traumatic effect on the children, further robbing them of their innocence.

At the orphanage, Mother fulfills her desire for continued education: something Ibtisam knows Mother craves desperately. The result, however positive for Mother, is negative for the children. Mother is often “too busy” to see her own children, leaving Ibtisam feeling “alone and afraid” (82). Ibtisam’s bond with Basel and Muhammad deepens, and they help fill the emotional gap created by the absence of their parents until Ibtisam loses them as well. She does not comprehend her parents’ choices, only that she is as alone and isolated as she was the night her family fled their home, but in this case, her abandonment was intentional. Basel and Muhammad also suffer physically and emotionally from their experience in both orphanages. The reality of children’s pain caused by their decision to separate the family “staggers” Mother and Father. Ibtisam’s memory of this lonely time in her life reveals both her inner strength and her wistfulness for love and home.

Although Father reestablishes his authority as protector and provider by refitting their small home to please Mother and reunite the family, their new life is still overshadowed by the constant presence of war. Ibtisam is always afraid at night. The children play at war games. Finding spent cartridges and even a gun is commonplace. War becomes normalized. Ibtisam now views the Israeli soldiers as human beings rather than others. She feels empathy toward the injured soldier and envisions how the same thing could happen to Father. The occupying force, though still discomfiting, is commonplace.

Ibtisam love of her home reflects the Palestinian culture’s deep love of homeland and its agricultural roots. Ibtisam feels a familiarity and connection to the land itself. It is the home of her heart, unlike anywhere else. It instills a sense of belonging and freedom. She drops the memoir’s title, commenting that the breeze at home makes her feel “free, like a bird, tasting the sky” (92). Ibtisam identifies symbolically with both the kite and the birds, escaping her occupied land in spirit. Ibtisam’s detailed descriptions of her parents slaughtering chickens and the goat giving birth also reflect her connection to the land, its resources, and the cycle of life and death.

Ibtisam begins to observe how boys and girls are treated differently in Palestinian culture. Her brothers are told to “wipe away their tears so they would not look like girls” when they return to the orphanage (90), and the woman asks why Ibtisam rips things up “like unruly boys” (84). The subtext is that girls are weak, or lesser than boys, and that girls should be quiet and well-behaved. Ibtisam also expands on the importance of the family’s religious beliefs. Mother prays for aid, and Father, a strict Muslim, prays five times a day. His devoutness inspires Ibtisam, who feels that she, too, “climb[s] inside the hand of God” with him when he prays (101). Islamic principles influence Palestinian values of loyalty, traditional gender roles, respect for elders, and education.

Finally, Ibtisam begins to perceive how education can foster self-expression and freedom. She knows that “school and learning were just as sacred to Mother” as religious holidays (106). Mother’s dream of higher education was crushed when her parents could no longer afford school fees. She married at age 15 and quickly assumed the traditional gender roles of wife and mother. Her marriage at such a young age to Father, a grown man 20 years older, can be difficult for contemporary Western readers to understand. It was not until 2019 that the Palestinian Authority raised the legal minimum age for marriage to 18 years old to end child and forced marriages (“Palestine.” Girls Not Brides). Mother’s early marriage and lack of access to further education reflect the gender inequality in Palestine in the late 1960s, which is still prevalent today. Mother craves knowledge to the point that Ibtisam thinks it does not matter what she studies, and Mother uses her expanded knowledge of sewing as a means of expressing herself. Her creations draw people to the home and give Mother a feeling of freedom from the isolation of their small house. Both parents stress the importance of education, and Ibtisam, seeing her brothers begin school, cannot wait to join them and learn more of Alef’s family members. Education is empowering.