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Content Warning: This section of the guide includes discussion of disordered eating, death by suicide, and sexual violence and harassment.
Crissy Dowling is the title character and one of the main protagonists of the novel. She is a Diana, Princess of Wales impersonator at Buckingham Palace Casino in Las Vegas. She is very famous in Las Vegas and prides herself on having an incredible amount of knowledge when it comes to the late Princess of Wales. Crissy has also gone to extreme lengths to make herself look like Diana, even having plastic surgery to alter her nose: “I wanted to make it clear that as vain as I am…I didn’t see one of Vegas’s premier plastic surgeons because I thought my nose was too big or too small. I just wanted to replicate Lady Di’s as much as possible” (122). Crissy also speaks in a British accent and uses often archaic British slang to make herself sound more like Diana. Additionally, she experiences disordered eating, which causes her to feel a kinship with Diana. Crissy is extremely funny and dramatic, but also very competitive, which causes her to fight at times with her sister. In general, Crissy lives in the past—in the golden era of Diana’s fame—and struggles to root herself in reality and the present.
For most of the novel, Crissy is an extremely static character who is only focused on embodying Diana. As a result, she is often confused about where her personality begins and Diana’s ends. Her obsession leads her to live an extremely isolated life, quite literally tucked away in her castle, Buckingham Palace Casino. However, after surviving a near-death experience when she is kidnapped by Futurium, she realizes that she must stop using Diana as a way to escape reality. As a result, she becomes a much more present sister, aunt, and lover and seems to embody her unique role as the Princess of Las Vegas instead of a Princess Diana impersonator by the end of the novel.
Betsy Dowling is Crissy’s younger sister and one of the main protagonists of the novel. Betsy is a former social worker “who carried herself more like a marine than a social worker who helped teens in trouble” (26). At the beginning of the novel, Betsy lives in Vermont with her newly adopted daughter, Marisa. Betsy has a history of being rebellious and getting into trouble, which Crissy often holds against her and uses to undermine her judgment. Crissy believes that Betsy killed their mother. In reality, their mother died by suicide after learning that her deceased husband sexually abused Crissy (something Crissy never confirms). Betsy never told Crissy this fact, indicating she wanted to protect her sister from more pain. Betsy does appear to have some guilt over their mother’s death and the death of their stepfather, who also died by suicide after Betsy caught him sexually abusing Crissy. Betsy also holds some resentment toward Crissy and is jealous that her sister got to move to Las Vegas and create a new life far away from their childhood trauma in Vermont.
Betsy tends to romanticize her life, which allows her to get swept up in other people’s schemes. She falls in love with Frankie Limback—a former client’s father—primarily because he promises to take her west and provide financial security for her and Marisa. She follows him to work for Futurium, which has disastrous results for her family. She is easily manipulated by those she loves and often doesn’t realize she is being used, such as when she is convinced by Futurium to participate in a Diana-themed photo shoot at Red Rocks.
Surprisingly, Betsy remains a relatively static character throughout the novel. She moves to Las Vegas under the guise of making a huge professional and personal change, but she ultimately remains a fiercely loyal and protective mother and sister. By the end of the novel, she is living at Buckingham Palace Casino with Marisa and is working as a Blackjack dealer.
Marisa Dowling is Betsy’s 13-year-old daughter and one of the novel’s protagonists. She is the narrator the reader hears the most from throughout the novel as she is the speaker of the italicized text that precedes each chapter. Betsy has just adopted Marisa at the beginning of the novel, and Crissy is shocked to learn that she has a niece. When Crissy first sees a picture of Marisa, she is surprised by her appearance:
[S]he was wearing seriously goth black eyeliner and a shade of lipstick that could only be called Harlot Red. She had auburn hair that was considerably lighter than the creosote that was Betsy’s and my natural color, and eyes that were brown velvet saucers. She had eyelashes I would have killed for. She was a pretty kid, but she was wearing a studded dog-collar choker and a vintage Sex Pistols T-shirt (72).
There is a lot of focus on how Marisa dresses primarily because it is so unique and individualistic. Both Betsy and Crissy spend most of the novel trying to look like other people, so Marisa’s steadfastness in her style indicates that she will not bend to peer pressure or bullying. Additionally, she is not impressed by money and celebrity. She is one of the first people to see through Futurium’s scheme, and, while she respects Crissy, she primarily is in awe of her talent, not her celebrity.
Marisa is very funny, but she often makes inappropriate jokes. She is scrappy and extremely talented with computers. After taking a computer class, she learned how to hack into WiFi, something that ultimately saves her from Frankie and Rory. She is seen as a hero following the hostage situation at Frankie’s house because she had the quick thinking to hide her tablet and record Rory’s confession and subsequent crime. At the end of the novel, she is happily living at Buckingham Palace Casino with Betsy and helping Crissy research new material for her show.
Frankie Limback is Betsy’s boyfriend and one of the novel’s main antagonists. At first, he appears to fill the knight in shining armor archetype: [I]if there was one thing…[Betsy] believed about Frankie Limback, it was anthropologic: he was an alpha male who was an excellent provider” (106-7). He is extremely wealthy and generous. However, from the beginning of their relationship, things appear amiss. Frankie’s son was one of Betsy’s clients, and the two fell in love while Betsy was counseling the boy and his family. He asks Betsy to move out to Las Vegas with him on a whim, offering to get her a job and financially support her. On the surface, it appears that his generosity shows how much he loves her and Marisa. However, it becomes clear that Frankie is using his relationship with Betsy as a way to get to Crissy and the casino. Frankie is often pushing Betsy for information about her childhood under the guise of getting to know her but is more likely planning to use this information to influence and control Crissy.
Once they arrive in Las Vegas, Frankie begins to act like a stereotypical old-school gangster. His language becomes more stilted, and he carries a gun with him everywhere. He guilts Betsy into doing Diana-impersonation-related tasks, which ultimately ends their relationship. It appears that Frankie gets in over his head with Futurium and doesn’t know how to get out of their scheme, as evidenced by the fact he cannot even look Betsy in the eye when she is brought to his house as a hostage. On the surface, it appears that Frankie is an extremely dynamic character who goes from being a strong family man to a criminal. However, through his commitment to Futurium and making money at any cost, it is clear he is a very static character and is a cowardly, selfish man who will use others to get ahead in life.
At the end of the novel, Frankie is in prison for his crimes committed while working for Futurium.
Yevgeny Orlov is Crissy’s love interest and one of the secret antagonists of the novel. At first, Yevgeny—who asks Crissy to call him “Gene”—appears to be a successful, but lonely businessman. Yevgeny’s family emigrated from Russia when he was a teenager. Crissy is immediately taken with his appearance:
The fellow was older than I was, midforties, with a distinguishing swath of gray in his temples, but otherwise dark hair that had not yet begun to recede. He had crow’s feet around eyes so dark they were coal colored and cheekbones that were severe…He was wearing a black blazer. He was too handsome and too well dressed for the witching hour at the BP. He belonged at a better class of casino (46-47).
Crissy is partly impressed with him because he looks so out of place to her at Buckingham Palace Casino; however, this subtly foreshadows his true intentions. Yevgeny is an assassin working for Futurium, and he’s responsible for the deaths of both Richie and Artie Morley and Cleo Dionne. Additionally, he is probably only at the casino that night to gain information before he assassinates Artie. Yevgeny is extremely good at his job and is especially adept at hiding his true profession. The only time he and Crissy fight is when she jokingly accuses him of being a spy, and his annoyance at her line of questioning hints that she may be onto something.
Yevgeny is murdered by Futurium when they discover he is planning to wear a wire for the FBI. Despite being an assassin who has killed multiple people, Yevgeny is a remarkably sympathetic character. Despite only knowing Crissy for a few months, he makes a deep impact on her life. Yevgeny’s death—and the police investigation into it—ultimately leads to the Dowling sisters healing their old rifts and becoming close once again.
Nigel Ferguson is Crissy’s best friend and confidant. Originally a server at one of Buckingham Palace Casino’s pubs, Nigel becomes Crissy’s co-star by chance:
Nigel was…slouching rather like the Prince of Wales, and his ears had the prince’s Dumbo-in-launch-mode mien. He was in his mid-thirties. When he started to share the order with the bartender, his accent was Scottish, and so I studied him carefully…He could sing more than a bit…And most of my audience couldn’t tell the difference between Scottish, Welsh, and Irish accents. Hell, he could have spoken like an East End boy, and a lot of the crowd would have thought it was the King’s English (18-19).
The fact that Nigel is not actually British, but instead Scottish is not an issue for the performance, which highlights how campy and unsophisticated Buckingham Palace Casino is. Nigel is fiercely protective of Crissy and her show. However, while other characters defend Crissy because they see that it’ll benefit them, Nigel does so because he genuinely cares for Crissy. In this way, he fills the Prince Charming archetype, which is ironic given his job as a Prince Charles impersonator in a tribute that pokes fun at the Prince and Princess of Wales’s failed relationship. Nigel goes to great lengths to protect Crissy, helping her escape dangerous situations and even securing her a gun when he worries that her life is in danger. Notably, Nigel does not save Crissy from the danger with Futurium. Instead, she saves herself, meaning that their relationship is built on mutual respect and admiration, not guilt or because Crissy feels indebted to him.
While Nigel and Crissy are frequently mistaken for being in a relationship, by the end of the novel, they are actually in a romantic relationship, and Crissy is in the process of rewriting her show to expand Nigel’s role.
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By Chris Bohjalian
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