The Wide Window

Aunt Josephine gives the children a tour of her house. They learn that she is afraid of many things, including the radiators, which she never turns on because she is afraid they will explode. She tells them not to use the phone unless it is an emergency, because she is afraid of electrocution. When Sunny babbles, Aunt Josephine comments that she will have to teach Sunny proper English because “Grammar is the greatest joy in life” (17). As far as Violet is concerned, inventing is life’s greatest joy. Klaus thinks it is reading, and Sunny thinks it is biting things. The children can only look at one another in disbelief. Josephine shows the children into the bedroom they will share and tells them that, in the trunks at the foot of each bed, there is a present for each of the children. Violet has a doll, Klaus has a toy train, and Sunny has a rattle. They thank Josephine politely, but once they are alone, they trade the gifts amongst themselves. Violet, too old for dolls, gives her doll to Sunny to bite on. Klaus gives Violet his train to take apart and use for her inventions. Violet points out that this leaves Klaus with nothing but a baby rattle, which does not seem fair. Sunny says “Schu!” which Lemony Snicket claims “[means] something along the lines of ‘It’s been a long time since anything in our lives has felt fair” (23).

Snicket comments that Sunny is correct—it is not fair that the children, having already lost their parents, are now being pursued relentlessly by “the evil and relentless Count Olaf,” who is trying to steal the fortune they inherited (23). It is not fair that they are moved from home to home, staying with distant relatives and experiencing more and more terrible events. Still, Violet speaks up to discourage her siblings from complaining. She points out that Josephine has made a real effort to welcome them and make them comfortable, and she says that they should not be critical of Josephine’s efforts. She squeezes Klaus’s shoulder to communicate her sympathy when he reluctantly admits that he still feels like complaining.

Josephine calls the children to dinner. Despite the chilliness of the evening, she is serving cold cucumber soup. She tells them that she is afraid to use the stove. Snicket breaks into the narrative to comment that he once had chilled cucumber soup in Egypt, and it is wonderful in such hot conditions—but it is terrible in the cold. After dinner, Josephine shows the children the house’s library. Klaus is initially very excited at the idea, but the library is filled with nothing but books on grammar. At one end of the room there is a window overlooking the lake. Josephine tells them about her fear of Lake Lachrymose. Although she loved the lake as a child and swam in it every day, her feelings changed when her husband, Ike, was killed by the leeches that live in the lake. The Lachrymose Leeches attack anyone who has eaten recently, and Ike did not wait long enough after eating to go in the water. Violet suggests that Josephine might be happier if she moved away from the lake, but Josephine tells her this is not possible. It would mean selling the house, and she has a terrible fear of realtors.

Over the next few days, the Baudelaire children try to maintain perspective on their situation by remembering the much worse circumstances they have previously experienced. Still, it is hard to be cheerful in the face of meals that consist mainly of orange juice and cold bread and days spent being taught endless grammar lessons. Violet takes apart the toy train and tries to invent something to warm food up with. One day, Josephine agrees to go into town to buy groceries ahead of the approaching hurricane. Because she is afraid of cars, they walk all the way down the long hill. Inside the grocery store, Violet is lost in thought when she bumps into someone. Although the man is dressed in a clichéd version of a captain’s outfit—a blue sailor’s cap, eye patch, and prosthetic leg—Violet immediately recognizes him as Count Olaf.

When Josephine appears, Violet tries to let her know who the man really is, but he introduces himself as “Captain Sham” and immediately sets about charming Josephine with flattery and a story about losing his leg to the Lachrymose Leeches. Josephine is utterly taken in and refuses to hear Violet’s protests that this is really Olaf. When Klaus finds the group, he, too, immediately knows the man is Olaf. He insists that Olaf show them his leg, where Olaf has a distinctive tattoo of an eyeball. Since Captain Sham apparently has a wooden prosthetic instead of a lower leg, however, there is no tattoo, and Josephine is more convinced than ever that the children are wrong. Captain Sham invites her to tea, handing her his business card. She immediately points out that he has mistakenly used the contraction “it’s” in place of the possessive “its” (50). He is clearly angry, but he manages to thank her for the correction. The dispirited children follow Josephine out of the store and make the long walk back up the hill carrying their loads of groceries.

Over a dinner of cold lime soup, the Baudelaire children try to convince Josephine that Sham is really Olaf. She angrily defends the man and tells them to stop being impertinent. When she points to the business card as evidence that Sham is authentic, Snicket interrupts the narrative to share an anecdote from his own life, in which he escaped from an enemy using fake business cards claiming to be a French admiral. The telephone rings. Because Josephine is too frightened to answer it, Violet volunteers. It is Olaf, who tells her “Put the old woman on the phone, orphan!” (59). Violet hangs up and tells Josephine it was a wrong number. The phone rings again. Feeling braver now that she has seen Violet survive using the phone, Josephine answers it this time. She chats with Olaf/Sham, who tells her she can call him “Julio” (60). He asks her to send the children out of the room so that he can talk to her about a surprise he has planned for the children. Frustrated, the children go to their room and discuss their fears about what Olaf might have planned for them. They think about calling Mr. Poe, but they realize that they are even less likely to be able to persuade Poe that Sham is actually Olaf. They decide that the best they can do is stay alert, even though this is not a satisfying or reassuring plan.

After hours of silently worrying and trying to come up with a better plan, the children are startled by the sound of shattering glass. They hurry out into the hallway, calling for their Aunt Josephine, but Josephine is nowhere to be found. As they head for the library, Violet has a vivid memory of calling out for Uncle Monty, their previous guardian, just before finding out that Olaf had killed the man. She remembers the many times she has woken in the middle of the night, calling out for her now-deceased parents. Klaus spots a note tacked to the library door. It is a suicide note from Josephine, claiming that she cannot continue life without Ike and is leaving them in the care of Captain Sham. The note is riddled with errors. Violet opens the library door. Cold air sweeps past the children, and they see that it is coming from the wide window that overlooks the lake. The window has been shattered, and the children feel sure that their plan to stay alert has not been enough to save Aunt Josephine.